What it’s like not to be me

We have to start with the idea that there is no me, or you actually. We have to say that there is just so the ego has something to hold onto in hopes of making sense of everything around us that we call this life. However, there is no you. Only the idea of you exists. You have created this idea of self based on your own experience and perception of life, but nothing more. As you have also done with every single aspect of your life before this. From your emotional relationships with the closest and dearest people in it, to a stranger that passes you on the street. All self made selves. I am simply a reflection of you, as are they. The idea of self is completely self made. Funny, right?

Being me, the real me, not Jason the character or false self, is not so much of being a person but more of experiencing a person. My life is completely effortless in that I do nothing except pay attention and follow the flow of the universe. I watch this guy Jason move around, do things, play the part but I have no attachment to him at all. In becoming the permanent observer comes death to the old concept of self.

I get to experience and take part in Jason’s life just as I would any character while watching a film or reading a book. This one just lasts much longer.

Now, what does that mean. I’m actually still trying to figure it out for myself. When the awakening process happens and the idea of self is torn away it’s truly like opening your eyes for the first time. It can’t be said enough just how shocking it is coming into a whole new world or, better yet, leaving behind any concept or idea of a world that you had. My previous universe had a user manual that I had created based on all of my thoughts, ideas and beliefs. That manual no longer exists either, it left with the self. Now I’m waking up in the goo and trying to sort it all out again. Since there is no self, there is no stress either in this process. It’s quite something to observe.

It might sound painful and isolating to be here but I have to tell you it’s exactly the opposite. I might also add that the self destruction phase prior to this was very much that though. If self realisation is what you are after, be prepared for that. What am I saying, you can never be prepared for something when you don’t even know what it is. I know I sure as hell wasn’t!

With that, I would like for you to take a moment and try to be the active observer in your mind. Step away from your thoughts and simply watch them. See what that does and try to stay there, as the observer, for as long as you can.

All questions lead back to the same answer. There is no self, none of this is real, yet everything is possible. The only thing holding you back is your idea of who and what you think you are. Question that.